on being a mommy

My babies are growing up so quickly.

I was folding laundry tonight and got a little sappy thinking about how little their clothes are now and how big they will soon be.  I want to fold little bitty tights for forever. I don’t want them to grow up.

It makes me cry to think that I haven’t taken full advantage of these little years. 

Being a mommy to little ones is a constant and often exhausting job. Not exhausting in the sense that it is the hardest job out there – I am beyond thankful that I get to be home with my kids and never wish to complain about my ‘job’ – but exhausting in that I am always on. There is always someone to assist or entertain or comfort or discipline. Not a lot of time to be quiet with my own thoughts or to start and finish a task in one sitting. 

Tonight I was cleaning and re-arranging downstairs as the boys played {wonderfully} upstairs.  I so appreciated the few moments to get things done, all the while knowing that they were destroying the playroom and that I would soon have to focus on cleaning that room.  It never ends.

And, honestly, sometimes I want it to. 

Sometimes I want to just stay in bed.

Sometimes I want to take a shower without interruption.

Or eat my breakfast first.

{ooooh, I’m sounding terribly selfish – please tell me you understand}

I want to listen to my music rather than Psalty.

I want to go shopping and actually try things on instead of just buying blindly and bringing them home to try on {and then, inevitably, returning most of it because nothing fits}.

I want to clean the floors and have them stay that way longer than 30 minutes.

But do I really? Is a life of focused shopping and cleanliness and sleeping in really better?

I’ve had so many friends and acquaintances struggle with infertility and it always makes me stop and think.  We are so fortunate to have our four children.  There are many who don’t have any and would give anything to have just one, and here I am with four and whining about how they disrupt my breakfast.

If you are a mommy, I know you know how I feel. We love our babies, but could use a break.  For a week. Preferably at a tropical location.

While I sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed by this enormous task of raising kids {all the while maintaining a healthy marriage, hobbies and friendships} I want to remember to cherish these times with my darlings. 

My silly boys who make horses out of wrapping paper tubes and play knights {with only one costume, hence the shirtless knight}.

 

Sweet little voices that sing songs to their baby sister.

Little innocent eyes.

       

These goofy kiddos who think making silly faces is one of the greatest pastimes ever.

 

And, of course, their complete sweetness as they sleep.

They are wonderful kids and I have the great honor of being their mommy. I hope I am doing a good job … and I hope I can take time every day to just enjoy where we are at {however dirty and disorderly it may be}.